Who’s a ‘Nice Guy‘?
According to Wikipedia, “A Nice Guy is an informal term, commonly used with either a literal or a sarcastic meaning for a man.”
A nice guy is a man who puts the needs of others before his own, avoids confrontations, does favours, gives emotional support, tries to stay out of trouble and generally acts nicely towards others.
Why Do Nice Guys Finish Last?
The “Nice guys finish last” view is that there is a discrepancy between the women’s stated preferences and their actual choices in men. In other words, women say that they want nice guys but really go for men who are “jerks” or “bad boys” in the end.
According to McDaniel, popular culture and dating advice: "...suggest that women claim they want a 'nice guy' because they believe that is what is expected of them when, in reality, they want the so-called 'challenge' that comes with dating a not-so-nice guy." Women tend to prefer a dominating, powerful and promiscuous man.
So, here are 7 nice guy mistakes that make other people lose respect for you or we can say that these mistakes make a nice guy finish last-
1. You Are Manipulative
Nice guys have a tendency to do things not because they are just being nice but because they think they are gonna get something in return, which is totally wrong. If you are truly being nice, you give without expectations.
2. Stopping Hanging-Out With Your Guy Friends For A Girl
You must maintain your own independence and your friends while you are in a relationship because ultimately when she breaks your heart, only your friends will be there to support you. It is about maintaining your Independence. You can have a relationship without always being around your girl.
3. Letting Things Slide When Someone is Disrespecting You
You must stand up for yourself by letting them know it's not okay, even if it rocks the boat. In turn, you will be taken seriously and respected.
4. Always Paying The Bill
This is a tricky one. A nice guy feels like he has to treat or he has to take people out for people to actually like him but the reality is that a lot of people that allow the nice guy to always pay are not really his friend. Unfortunately, there are some really shitty people out there in the world and they will let you pay always and take advantage of you and they will never be your true friends.
We teach people how they can treat us. If you allow yourself to be taken advantage of all the time and you are always offering to pay like you have to treat to be liked, people will take advantage of you and thus, you must teach people how to treat you. You don't have to pay- money doesn't buy friends or respect.
5. Not Being A Man Of Your Word
It is not that they don't want to do it or they don't want to try, but they overcommit themselves. They say yes to the people who ask them for things and later they realise that they are never going to be able to do it. It is about being a man of your word. If you say yes or if you commit to something, you gotta do it. You can't let them down. If you commit, do it!
6. Allowing Insecurities To Destroy Your Confidence
INSECURITIES - everybody got them but the thing you cannot do is allow your insecurities to ruin and destroy your confidence. If you are insecure, people can see it and people are going to take advantage of you because of that. You got to respect yourself first. It's about taking care of yourself and loving yourself. It starts with you and when you respect yourself, other people will see it and will respect you for the man you have become.
7. Investing More Into Your Relationships Than Others Invest in You
Are you the one who is always calling, texting and doing for them but they rarely ever do anything for you. Are you always putting in all the work? This is the sign that you are viewed as the nice guy. They are not interested in developing a friendship or the relationship any further. Healthy relationships are built on mutual investment in developing and cultivating the relationship. If you are always the one putting in the effort, chances are it's time to move on!
8. Apologizing For The Things That Are Not Your Fault
When somebody says anything or has a problem with anything, you apologize, even though you did nothing wrong and there's nothing that you need to be apologizing about. You got to stop doing that. You got to stop taking ownership and responsibility for the things that are not your fault. Stop apologizing for things if you don't know what they are upset about. It not your fault. Stop smoothing it over and if it's not your fault don't say you're sorry.
9. Always Being Available
Nice guys are always available for everybody. Have you ever heard the saying "Absence makes the heart grow fonder." You should not always drop whatever you are doing to go do what these people want you to do. It's okay to say NO.
10. Compromising Your Dignity
You should always stand up for your dignity because you are worthy of honour, pride and respect. If you ever lose that or you're routinely giving it away because other people are treating you poorly or you are not standing up for yourself and doing what everybody else wants as opposed to what you want because you don't want to upset anybody or you don't want to people to not like you.
You got to stop it because until you realise that you are amazing and you are worthy of respect, there's nothing and nobody that is going to fix you until you believe in yourself. Always take pride in yourself.
Comments
Post a Comment