Why You Should Stop Trying To Be Perfect All The Time

What is Perfection?

The standard definition is, "It is the condition, state, or quality of being free from all flaws or defects."

But I think the actual definition should be, "A 10-letter word describing something that does not exist or prison." Perfection is a virus that infects the mind of which it attaches itself until it eventually destroys the host. I hate the very word perfection. It has driven me crazy for years guided by fear. I was constantly comparing myself to my peers. Stressing and striving to reach some idea that only existed in my head.

You Have Also Thought Perfection is Real, Right?

But, Have you ever seen a perfect tree in real life? Have you ever gone into a forest and seen a perfect tree? You haven't because they all got a little something going on but still you don't compare one tree with another because somehow they're all beautiful.

But when it comes to people we always compare ourselves with others. We don't seem to see that we are all beautiful in all of our expressions. So we dissect ourselves into pieces, judging each other thinking perfection is something that we can achieve which leads us to feel depleted and defeated.

So Why Do Everyone Wants Perfection?

Many of us have this perfectionism gene and the reason why we're trying to be a perfectionist is that we're trying to insulate ourselves from criticism. We think if we get it perfect, no one will give us negative feedback or nobody will criticize us. If we do it perfectly, no one will be able to attack us. And we do all these because of our fear of disappointing people. We're managing to not disappoint people, nor by lying and neither by being codependent but by actually trying to be a perfectionist so that nobody criticizes us.

And in my opinion, I do believe that perfectionism actually stems from insecurity. Because of the social media culture that we all live in today, everything is absolutely perfect and everything is face-tuned and photoshopped beyond belief. Everybody has the same almost impossible body type with extremely smooth skin.

Salvador Dali said it best, "Have no fear of perfection because you never reach it".

I was reading the other day about a Japanese tradition called Kintsugi. What they do is if an object breaks, they fill the cracks with pure gold because they believe that when something suffers damage and has a history, it is all the more beautiful.

You don't need to be a perfect person with perfect makeup, perfect skills, or a perfect build because the truth is real people aren't perfect, and perfect people aren't real.

What really matters is what you think about yourself. Do you love and like yourself? When you look into the mirror every day, do you like the reflection looking back at you? Are you proud of yourself?

In the pursuit of trying to make everyone happy and trying to please everyone else, oftentimes you can lose yourself and you don't take good care of yourself. You have to accept the fact that not everyone is going to be happy and also that not everyone is not going to like you. No matter how hard you try, you will never be perfect. No one is perfect and yet we try to be perfect. 

Why You Should Stop Trying To Be Perfect all the time?

If you're trying to reach for the perfect body, the perfect thigh gap, or the perfect set of six-pack abs, what's the proof that you actually going to be happy after achieving that. 

We're not perfect. Life's not perfect. Perfect is an illusion. Perfection doesn't actually exist anywhere. I know that's a very cliche thing to say because it's like embracing your imperfections and you're fine the way that you are.

And just because everything's imperfect doesn't mean you shouldn't strive for more because progression allows you to improve the things that need to be improved and make a better person out of it.

Perfect might apply to certain fields like accounting or being a doctor etc. But within the creative and artistic world, it is unnecessary. You should try new things and do new things every day without trying to be perfect in it. Because that's how you will improve your overall personality. But if you choose only one thing and try to be perfect in it, you're just going to waste your whole life on it, and it's not worth it.

We're all beautiful the way we are but we shouldn't accept ourselves exactly the way we are. Often times we try to compensate ourselves and say things, like accept your imperfections, be exactly who you are with all the flaws and you don't even need to work on yourself, don't work on your personality, don't exercise, and don't do anything because you're fine the way you are.

But I refuse to believe it because there should be a balance. If you accept every single flaw that you have or anything that you do then you're never going to grow as a person. You should always do some self-analysis and introspection to identify what things or flaws need to be changed and what doesn't need to be changed or improved because that's how we as humans evolve. 

There are two doors in life. Door number one- be perfect and be admired or door number two- be real and be loved. I say choose door number two and choose it quickly because life is too short to try to live up to something that doesn't even exist. It makes no sense. So please create your own unique expression, colour outside the line, be the pretzel that refuses to knot, do the dance that nobody's ever seen before, and don't worry if people stop and stare. I mean if the leaning tower of Pisa was straight, nobody would care. 

So don't worry about always being first and getting it right. Embrace your mistakes, they are to be savoured. Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavour and true success is being yourself in a world that's trying to make you someone else.

Don't strive for perfection but don't settle for mediocrity- Mac James